Vik the King · Iron Lance · the king of the dealSverre af Haldorholm, aka the Viking
“If the world burns, I want to die in the sun. I’m a Viking, not a smoked salmon!” (ch. 11)
“You want people to use your book to make something? Easy! A nice log fire that’ll last all winter!” (ch. 20)
“If I shut up, I think. And if I think, I panic. So I talk.” (ch. 19)
“Beer is the mead of the 21st century, it helps me articulate my philosophical point.” (ch. 19)
“I’d like to see you try, facing a nuclear octopus.” (ch. 44)
“Technically, she only had to interrupt me.” (ch. 19)
“With me, it’s going to be one hell of a show! Hand out the sunglasses. They’re all going to get a tan.” (ch. 47)
“I’m a demigod, people adore me!” (ch. 45)
“I was born without a weak mode.” (ch. 44)
“There you go, see, when you want to! I love making you angry, it relaxes me.” (ch. 22)
“A good row can pay off big time! I never get tired of it! Take my advice: ‘Take the money!’” (ch. 4)
Read the summary of his journey, chapter by chapter
Who is he?
Coraline’s fictional character
Coraline’s ex, who brings the North into her life: a road, a longship, a blizzard and enough to write a whole book.
On set, the journalist invites him for the launch of The Hammock and the Hummingbirds. He’s come to defend his version of events, fearing for his reputation.
The author — “Yes, because I do what I like, I’m the one drawing. You try drawing tousled curls, I’m no Einstein!”
his father Bjornulf · his mother Lærke Freydis · his ex Alva · his children Freya and Alvar
His talents and his flaws
His talents: deal-making. Sailing, mechanics, DIY that actually holds. An ear for jazz, vinyl and the jukebox, inherited from his music-loving mother: you can hear it all through the book, and in the playlist of the music quoted in the novel.
His flaws: the Scorched Lands sickness (the Singed-Toasted sickness that stays hidden inside, when the singed-toasted think they got off unscathed). Drink. Hyper-control. Unresolved family conflicts. The fear of being weak and the manipulation to protect himself. The Scorched Lands sickness and the Singed-Toasted are words invented in the novel, explained in the Dictionary of Invented Words.
What Coraline says about him
“I have to admit, I was crazy about him! CRAZY!” (ch. 1)
“In short, when I see him, I’m smitten.” (ch. 3)
“I fell in love with him.” (ch. 5)
“My giant Cupid with the angel’s smile takes me by the waist and kisses me for a long time.” (ch. 7)
“A Viking hero… of happy hour.” (ch. 10)
“OK, I admit, his angel face, his irresistible charm and his off-the-scale charisma more than make up for his little family hiccups.” (ch. 10)
“His contradictions make the demigod human.” (ch. 11)
“I’d say more Radio Viking FM, volume 200%, 24/7, adverts included.” (ch. 19)
“Mind you, it’s like a sober addict, or a balanced Viking, they’re hard to find.” (ch. 22)
“The Viking and his mobile delusions of grandeur!” (ch. 28)
“When the Viking blows through, the spin cycle’s through!” (ch. 38)
“It’s like walking a tightrope… with the Viking swinging it in every direction.” (ch. 46)
What he created and what makes him memorable
His vehicles: his Drak-car, his mobile home on wheels, nicknamed “the Blizzard”. His Drak-4×4, for crossing fjords and moods. His Longship, for going far or running away fast. His Vol-vik, his Hobbit-cat and his Teardrop. His vintage boats and his old-school collector cars. And his XXL antenna, home-made to talk to the whole world.
His cries: Overstag! literally “ready about!”, his Viking cry to change tack. Hold on! meaning “keep holding!”, which Coraline keeps mistaking for “catch!”. AAARRRGGGHHH, his cry that wakes up his Viking ancestors.
His journey to the Nord Ultima and his road map.
And a little collateral damage to others, which he didn’t see, couldn’t see or didn’t want to see. Nobody’s sure: case closed, no further action.
Bonus scenes
The audience’s favourite Viking
The author — Don’t worry, you’re unforgettable!
The journalist — It’s true that according to the ratings, you’re “The Audience’s Favourite Viking”. We’re all won over by your radiant charm!
(The audience goes wild, thunderous applause.)
The audience — We love you, Viking!!!
The author — A true rock frontman: 2 metres of charisma.
The audience cheers him — Vi-king! Vi-king! Vi-king!
The Viking — Thank you! (He takes a sip.) Thank you, thank you!
The Viking at the stove
The Viking — Drops are our Proust’s madeleine! All kids are crazy about them. I always take some in the drak-car, I can’t stop eating them. And yet I love cooking! Frikandel is delicious! Sausage, mayo, curry, chopped onions and Brussels sprouts. After the show, I’m inviting you all for an ice-cold kopstootje: literally a headbutt, it clears out your sinuses and your memory. We’ll be thick as thieves again!
Invent your own glorious name and your funny line for your creator profile and add it to the Directory of the Joyful Imperfect.
Then share your creation in the Gallery of Imperfect Gems.